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Fear Of Rejection

Let’s talk Fear of Rejection.

It’s a real logical fear that keeps many of us stuck.⠀It stops us from asking for the sale, following up on leads, showing up online, trying new things, launching new products or services, speaking up for ourselves, and asking for what we want! ⠀

Coming from a sales background where I had to put myself in situations where I would get rejected every single day not only helped me build resilience to being rejected but it allowed me to learn these three things:

1. The more times you get rejected, the easier it becomes and the more success you actually achieve.

Without asking for what you want (a sale) the less likely someone will say yes, so it’s important that you do more asking for the sale! 

Even though you notice the fear, the more times you put yourself out there the less uncomfortable it becomes and the more opportunities that become available to you. You have to learn to push through the fear and just ask.

2. When someone says NO to what you are selling- 99% of the time it has nothing to do with YOU! ⠀

It’s important to be mindful of what you make the rejection mean. They could be saying NO for a plethora of reasons: wrong time, not enough money, they cannot see the value in what you’re offering, it didn’t meet their needs, or they’re just too overwhelmed to even make a decision even though they know it’s what they need.

If you make the rejection mean something about YOU like you’re not worth it, you’re not good at what you do, you don’t know what you’re doing, you’re a failure etc, the only outcome this will achieve is less action, equalling fewer results. ⠀

Each time you get rejected, and you will more often than not, be mindful of what you make it mean.

Learn to detach the meaning from you as an individual.

And focus on the facts. When we start to bring emotion or personal reasons into it, that’s when we fall into a victim mentality which keeps us playing small, staying safe and stuck in non-action.

⠀3. Focus on what you can control.

You cannot control what other people think or do. You cannot control what reasons someone has for saying NO, but what you can control is how you show up, how you communicate, and your ability to adapt to the situation.

Taking time after a sales interaction to debrief with yourself so you can learn from the situation is paramount.

Asking yourself what you did well, what you could do differently next time and how you could improve helps you to choose a more positive perspective.

You may realize you didn’t build enough rapport, didn’t communicate the value clearly enough, or didn’t create enough interest to uncover the client’s needs so when you got to the sales part, it fell flat.

Don’t let someone else’s reasons for not saying ‘YES” derail you from your purpose and your ability to achieve the results you want. If you don’t have the results you want yet – all it means is that you haven’t asked enough people yet!

Keep going. The next one could say ‘Yes’!